Day 350: My first day back at work

My first day proper. I have had 2 KIT days and today I think I can say they helped. My first official day back at work was not like ripping a plaster off a weeping scabby wound: anticipating the pain… followed by horrible pain.

I was a bit restless last night so sleep was a bit off. Awoke at 6 and then 6.30am. Had time to wash and dress and then get my little poohead out of bed. I took time and care to try to enjoy my 20mins with her before bundling her into the car for our 4 minute journey down the road to the childminder’s. As I walked up the steps I noticed she was smiling… she was looking forward to her day, as was I. We chatted a little and then I ran off to work.

The day was filled with all you could hope it would have to offer; 1 melt-down (not mine), 3 projects in mild peril and a call from hubby at 4.30 to say he had no car key to pick up Lo-Lo or to open the front door. Love it. But secretly (or not so secretly) I really enjoyed today… am I allowed to say that? Like I said I think the KIT days helped me so going back to work wasn’t such a shock and Lo-Lo’s settling in days (6 in total before today) helped make a happier baby in the morning. I also thought I’d help myself out a bit and have her sleep in the vest I wanted her to be in in the morning… is that a bit skanky? Anyway, I was sat on the tube in the morning, listening to music, catching up on some texts and emails. I had a hot cup of tea when I got into work. I treated myself to a bircher muesli breakfast and sushi (love the sushi!) for lunch. A totally unaffordable habit but a girl’s got to eat! I said hello and goodbye to some lovely friends. I dressed nicely, in a white shirt and a silk scarf. I put some lippy on, co-ordinated accessories. I genuinely cannot wait for this week’s Stylist to come out. All these things I took for granted before baby.

Work was also great. My brain thinking about problem solving and negotiating. Not constantly planning 15 steps ahead. Working out when to squeeze in all the house work, cooking etc whilst having a baby that needs attention, entertaining and comes with a sound track.

And the silence.

Even with my headphones on to drown out other noise to help me concentrate… it wasn’t high pitched and severely distracting. I had silence. I love my daughter but she keeps me very busy, you have no time or space for yourself. And that is what you receive when you go back. A piece of yourself. Room to breathe. I know it’s not like this for everyone, I’m lucky. But today was good and Lo-Lo was a big part of this with a great start to my day.

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